06: Nov. 8 - 2023
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Welcome to the Pivot with Passion podcast. Hi, I'm Penny Castleman. I believe everyone is deserving of a phenomenal life. And that life starts when you grab a red marker and claim what you truly desire. Regardless of where you came from, where you're at, or where you think you're headed, life is what you make of it.
And when you learn to pivot with passion, your world expands. Explodes with opportunities. Go grab your favorite beverage and let's shake things up as we explore how to pivot with passion.
Hello, my friend.
12 years ago. I was entertaining selling my house.
I was. Ye few years out of.
Getting divorced.
And I thought, well, maybe this is a good time to downsize
And move from the suburbs into downtown.
not knowing What houses in the area we're going for? I reached out to a realtor friend. Who wasn't that familiar with my neighborhood, but she said, Let me bring over some other.
Agents. And collectively the four of us will tour your house and I'll get their insight. And we can talk about next steps.
they came in toward the house while. I was at work and when I got home, That evening the realtor called and said, there was one big comment. So I leaned in a little and said, yeah, what was it thinking, oh, this is going to be something good.
She said. They all kept looking at me and asking.
There's only one person that lives in this house.
Out church. Oh, my gosh. I was so. Embarrassed.
So I just had to laugh. I thought. This is embarrassing. Yes. Only one person lives in this house.
It was shortly thereafter. I decided, okay, now is not the right time to sell this house. However, What I could do. Is to become a master. At editing. And I'm not talking to editing for this podcast or. Something that you write, I'm talking, editing for my life for stuff. So think about it. If your arms are full. Of stuff and your calendar's full of events and your mind is swirling with thoughts. How on earth, can you pick up a red marker? And pause long enough to claim what you want.
I can't make this any more of a perfect analogy that Use red markers to Edit. The students work.
At the time this episode drops. There are only two months left. In 2023.
So what if instead of seeing clutter or panic at the size of your to-do list or calendar. Or having the same internal conversations with yourself. Over and over. What if you found a way to become master at the edit? And experience more ease. And less overwhelm.
Well, my friend.
In this episode.
I want to help you. Re-imagine what the balance of 2023 could look like for you.
And although I talked at the top about edits to things and thoughts and time, I'm going to focus on just the time aspect since. That seems to be one of the top.
Things. That people site. For not being able to get something done. I don't have the time. Or I wish I could, but I'm busy. Time is this. Ubiquitous. phrase that we are all too easily dismissive of.
So while I focus on this time, edit. Idea. I'll walk you through a model that I use. That's helped me become more masterful with my time.
And then you can apply it to your life and start experiencing more ease and grace, this. Busy. Holiday season.
One of the situations I encounter. And saw through my corporate years and while coaching others. is our need to cram. One more thing. On the calendar.
But the problem with doing that. Is You think you can do it all. Because if you put it on the calendar, Chances are it's likely going to get done. Which leaves you feeling? Important. Right. Look at my calendar. It's there's so much on it. You might also feel needed. oh, that's so nice that they asked me to do that. Or invited me to go.
And if you're in corporate, you might feel more successful. Look at all these things on my calendar work personal, I can manage it all. But what happens is.
Overloading your calendar leads to burnout. And resentment. And I don't know about you, but. I am sure. you've encountered One of two things in your lifetime. One Someone invited you to an amazing party. And you had to turn them down. Because you already said yes to something. That if you're honest. You really didn't want to do. Or.
Too.
You didn't have a conflict. When it came to scheduling something. But either. Right before the event. During, or even after you had this huge amount of resentment. Because it is not aligned with what you want to do.
And that's no fun. we become overwhelmed.
Knowing that the schedule we've created is not sustainable. And that especially shows up. During the holiday season, when of course we want to experience all the sparkle and all the fun and all the things. But at what cost.
And it's no wonder. That we think. We can do it all or we should. Do it all.
Because our society. Praises people for being busy.
I've said it before, but how many times has someone asked you. how are you and your immediate response is, I'm busy.
And that might make you feel.
More important, more needed, more successful. All of those things that I talked about earlier.
But here's one of the biggest culprits when we're adding things to our calendar.
We underestimate. The time, it will take us to accomplish a task. Partially because we're so good at routine activities.
Not only are we really good? At repetitive tasks. But we also carry this. Optimistic ideal. That all will go as planned.
Little side caveat. I recently redid the main bath in the house. I'm a big DIY'er I did it all myself well with a little help. But.
I thought it was going to take me.
Two months. Knowing that I was only going to devote time on the weekends. My friend. It was nearly two years.
Oh, It pains me to even say that. Almost two years before the bathroom was. What I would consider. Complete
I have been doing DIY my entire life. I knew it was going to take longer. Then two months, but I was super optimistic. I mean, I had done all these other projects and you might do the same.
But here's the question. If you're overwhelmed over booked over committed.
Who's writing all this down. Who in the moment that you're adding something to your calendar? Who is holding the red marker.
You. Yes, my friend, you are holding the marker. That puts things on your calendar. So why do we do that?
we're going to go back in the way back machine to 1977. And that is when the psychology field coined the term planning fallacy. And at its core is basically everything I've just shared with you. It studied why we underestimate the amount of time. It takes us to complete a task. Now there are numerous. Factors that impact this.
You can go on the Google machine and look up for yourself.
here's a quick illustration.
Have you ever driven somewhere? Arrived at your destination. And not remembered how you got there.
Luckily you made it there. Safe and sound. Yay.
But your mind was probably thinking of something else. And it was so routine for you to get to. The grocery store. That you don't have a recollection of. Being at a stoplight. Are turning left or pulling into a parking spot.
And that's one of the traps we get in. When we start putting things on our calendar is we forget.
That routine things that happen in our day that are automatic. That are not on the calendar that we don't have to think about. Still take time.
Let that sink in.
And maybe on a good day. It takes you 10 minutes to get to the grocery, but if you don't go at the right time, Maybe it takes you 20. But because we're skewed a little optimistic when it comes to how much we can do what we can get done in a day. We default to, oh, it'll just be a 10 minute trip to the grocery store. When in fact it could turn in to half an hour or more just based on circumstance.
And this is why it is so important.
To become masterful. At the edit.
Because who wants to live in a constant state of frustration, especially as we head in to the holidays.
It's time for a clarity cocktail.
When you have a dream. You've got to grab it. And never let go.
Carol Burnett.
When I read this. I knew I had to have it featured in this week's clarity cocktail.
I love this quote from Carol because
It's such a great prompt for a visualization exercise.
think about when you were a kid. you probably had a favorite stuffed animal or blanket.
And that. Item was all important. You slept with it. You walked with it. It went everywhere with you.
Now you may have set it down to eat. But somehow you would always find your way back.
Because it was that important to you. And it somehow. Felt like a piece of you.
When I read. When you have a dream. You've got to grab it and never let go.
if you have a dream, grab it like you would your favorite stuffed animal or blanket from your childhood. But what I found as I became an adult.
That dream or goal.
I started carrying it around, but somewhere along the way, I set it down.
And started to pick up lots of other seemingly important things. And by the end, I forgot to pick it back up. that was me with speaking. I set down that dream. And filled my arms up. With other things
it wasn't until 2022. That I decided to drop at least one arm. Full of things. To pick up that dream.
So if your arms are full,
And when I say your arms, I mean, Your calendar, your to do list. The thoughts in your mind?
If your arms are full, how can you pick up a red marker? How can you pivot with passion when you're overloaded with too much stuff? I get it. We all have capacity issues. There's only so much time, only so many thoughts. Only so much stuff. That we can process and hold at any given time. But imagine if you became masterful at editing your time. Then my friend, you could pick up that dream or goal or big vision you've been holding. And begin to take action. On bringing it to life. What would that feel like?
more ease. More joy.
For me. It definitely meant more work. In pursuing, speaking. And even working on this podcast.
But even with that work.
It didn't feel as heavy.
As some of the things that I let go.
So that stuffed animal, that blanket from childhood. It's really just a metaphor for you holding onto your dream or goal.
And don't forget. That has a child. You always found a way to keep that front and center. And you can do it again as an adult.
With the dream. That you've had.
And now, back to the episode. Cheers.
At this point in the episode, you might be thinking, yes, I am ready to become master. Of the edit when it comes to my time.
But penny, what are some tactical things that I can do?
I'm so glad you asked. Here are three things. That I do that. I want to pass along for your consideration.
Firstput you. on your calendar. Now statistics show 42% chance. That you'll honor, the time that you set aside. On your calendar. Now you might say 42%. Penny that's low. That's less than half. My friend, but conversely. There's a 58% chance.
It'll never happen. If you don't write it down. Mm.
I will tell you. It's hard.
Like I've said before adulting can be difficult.
But putting you. On the calendar.
Is a declaration that you are important. You matter and what you want.
Is important.
So give it a go. The second thing. take a pause. And don't answer right away.
We are so gamified. With our phones. And computers. Everything is right now. Immediate.
It can be very difficult to take a pause in the moment, especially when the opportunity in front of you sounds spectacular. But remember that this thing. Is going to take up time on your calendar. So just pause. It's so much easier. To tell someone, let me get back to you. Versus having to turn around and then tell someone. No. Later on.
And third, as you're looking at your calendar
Ask yourself. Do I have to do it.
Then ask yourself. Is that true?
If in fact this thing in front of me is important enough for me. To take action on. What can I release? From my list.
And if you can't. Release. Anything. Who can I ask for help?
Those
Prompts Have made a huge difference in how I approach my calendar. in my twenties. My friends would joke they had to get on my calendar a month out. And sadly, it was very true. I packed every ounce of activity into my life. And I kept that pace for decades. There was almost not an evening that I had free.
For myself.
I was always on the go.
until I was diagnosed with cancer in 2017. And then suddenly it became very easy for me to wipe off every single commitment from my calendar. Because during that time, my only focus was getting better. But I found something interesting during that time. Suddenly. Opportunities came up that I could say yes to. Unexpected visits with friends.
There were so many magical moments. That I was missing out on
Because I already had something booked. And I guarantee whatever I had booked.
May have had me feeling regretful. Afterwards.
So I want to ask you.
How different would your life look, if you had more space?
On your calendar.
Who might you have an opportunity to connect with? Who might you be more present with?
My friend before we part ways I want you to know that. You have the power today? To impact your tomorrow. I want you to choose to embrace ease. And grace this holiday season. I want you to feel empowered. To take back your red marker. And dare I say. Pivot with passion. I want you to love what's on your calendar.
I want you to pick up a red marker.
And claim. The holiday magic. That's all around you. This season. Because my friend life is short. And I want you to enjoy. Every single minute.
Friend, thanks for listening to this episode of Pivot with Passion. If you've been feeling stuck, exhausted, or frustrated, this is your permission slip to go grab a red marker and claim the life you desire and deserve. If you enjoyed this episode, share it with a friend, and then hop over to rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts.
Because my goal is to put a red marker in everyone's hand and I need your help to spread the word and make that happen. Until the next episode, go grab a red marker, get excited for your future, and make your first move to pivot with passion.
